I am pissed at rottentomatoes.com or maybe I am pissed at movie reviewers in general, I don’t know. What I know is that I am pissed. I recently watched two great movies, Terminator Salvation and Transformers: Revenge of the fallen. I went into the movie with the right mindset and judged the movies based on what they were supposed to be and they were great. But on Rotten Tomatoes they were not that great. Terminator Salvation is currently rated at 33% and Transformers:Revenge of the Fallen is rated at a paltry 22% .WTF?

Below you will see rotten tomatoes “consensus” on Terminator Salvation

Consensus: With storytelling as robotic as the film’s iconic villains, Terminator Salvation offers plenty of great effects but lacks the heart of the original films.

WTF? lacks heart? these people obviously fell asleep at the midnight showing because not only did it have the heart of the original films the whole damn film was about the human heart, physically and metaphorically. These critics they are ridiculous. I don’t know who writes the reviews for these movies on rotten tomatoes, I think the first ones are by approved critics and the rest are by random people, but whoever they are they are crazy wrong.

Now below I have added in the “consensus” on rotten tomatoes for Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Consensus: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is a noisy, underplotted, and overlong special effects extravaganza that lacks a human touch.

underplotted? overlong special effects? human touch? yes I agree! but this is what makes the movie so great! jeez have these people ever actually seen the original transformers cartoon? Optimus Prime’s trailer would fly out from behind a bush when he transformed. the plots were all about stopping whatever extremely stupid thing Megatron came up with. You don’t go into a transformers movie expecting the plot to be on par with something like Shawshank Redemption. It is a friggin movie with robots who transform into cars for Christ’s sake. whatever I am pissed.

When I looked at the yahoo ratings for Transformers 2 I got even more annoyed with “professional” movie critics. Professional critics gave the movie a C-, while yahoo users gave it an A-. If you are getting paid for your opinion your opinion had better be based on what people seeing the movie will think damnit! otherwise why would I bother reading you crap! When I went in to see Transformers 2 I turned off my brain and prepared for the wonderful special effects, stupid humor, and plot that would make no sense. That is what the movie is supposed to be!  here is the yahoo page for Transformers 2.

Gah! I hate professional movie critics, in fact I hate critics in general. I have gone to so many friggin super expensive restaurants that got good ratings from these so called critics and guess what the restaurants sucked. I want to get paid for my BS opinions. It is my opinion that Averatec makes the best laptop ever! go out and buy one and see if you think that was a good statement.

Whatever that is all. This is the Ranting Jamaican signing off from Taipei, Taiwan.

P.S.
please don’t go buy an Averatec laptop. Well you can buy their netbook. Their netbook is just a rebranded MSI Wind. But other than that STAY AWAY! I had an Averatec a while back, I think it gave me second degree burns on my lap.

After two hours constant meaningless repetition, trying to memorize Chinese characters, I had two things on my brain. First was a headache. The second was Movies. Since I had a headache the first thing I did was pop an Excedrin. The next thing, of course, was to go to the Internet Movie Database and wander around the site. I saw pictures of Mickey Rourke from Iron Man 2, and found out about Jada Pinkett’s new show on TNT. But then, I found myself looking at the IMDB top 250 list, located here. And boy did I get a positive surprise!

FINALLY! the Godfather is not number one on the list anymore. I am sorry but the Godfather and Godfather part II were the most boring movies I have ever watched. I would rather watch “In the Mix” with Usher and Emmanuelle Chirqi than those long, boring, and dry films. I don’t know how long ago the change happened but whenever it occurred it was long overdue. Sheez! The Shawshank Redemption is a MASTERPIECE, it is the Mona Lisa of films. I don’t know if there will ever be a better film. If any of you reading this have not seen The Shawshank Redemption I urge you, no I COMMAND YOU, to go rent it and see it immediately. You will be much better after the experience. It will probably be the best 2 hours of your life.

If you clicked on the link to IMDB’s top 250 movie’s you would find that not only does it have a 9.1 rating, it also has the most votes out of all the movies on the list! that’s saying something. More people had a strong reaction to The Shawshank Redemption than any of the other films.

You may be wondering why this is such a wonderful film, and I can’t really tell you because i don’t know. I don’t review movies for a living. But i will tell you these two things about it.

First the music is amazing, it is the most beautiful soundtrack I have EVER heard. Thomas Newman is one of the most amazing composers on the PLANET (he’s not Mozart or anything but lets face it, Mozart is dead). Remember the amazing music in WALL-E? That’s right, Thomas Newman! When you watch the movie listen in for “Brooks Was Here” you’ll know when you hear it.

Second the acting and storyline are top notch. Tim Robbins and Morgan Freeman are amazing in this movie and the other actors are great too. They have that one guy from the highlander movie and the other guy that was the Sherriff on Roswell. But anyways think about this. Even though all of the main characters are criminals, somehow you are able to really sympathize and understand their points of view.

I know this blog post is 15 years late (Shawshank Redemption came out in 1994). But this is for those weirdo’s who have not yet seen the movie. You are the ones who are 15 years late! I beg you, please go see it. Maybe they will have it on Blu-ray and you can see every wrinkle on Morgan Freeman’s face.

If you don’t heed my advice and see this movie the loss is yours! peace out ya’ll!